At the end of the year
I began
to make things smaller.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A friends list,
cut back
to the people
with whom I do not need
to explain myself \u2013
family,
old friends,
those who already know
the shape of me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I stepped away, too,
from a role
I had carried faithfully
without ever quite
belonging to its purpose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There was nothing wrong
with the work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Only the quiet knowledge
that time is finite,
and if I am going
to give mine away,
I want to care
where it goes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Study finished.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
No next chapter
waiting neatly
on the desk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So for now
I am at home,
sorting cupboards,
clearing drawers,
letting go
of the things
that have gathered
without being chosen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Perhaps that is what
I am doing elsewhere too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Removing
what no longer fits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Keeping
what feels true.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Making room
before I know
exactly
what will fill it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Next month
I begin something new \u2013
a small step
back toward work,
back toward possibility,
back toward a part of myself
that has been waiting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I do not know yet
where it leads.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For once,
that does not feel
like being lost.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It feels
like space.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
At the beginning of 2024, I was still finding my way through the loss of my dad. Somehow, in the middle of that grief, I had finished my studies. With that chapter closed, I found myself clearing space, letting go of what no longer felt right and trying to work out what might come next.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[435],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5903","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poems"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5903","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5903"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5903\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6561,"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5903\/revisions\/6561"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5903"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5903"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hamjak.com\/ma2005\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5903"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}