It is now week 7 of SSK12, I’ve submitted my first assignment and I am struggling to get back into a solid study routine following the aftermath of a narrowly avoided disaster at work.
It is interesting to note how my priorities changed over the last three weeks. Before recent events at work I had been working on a time management exercise for my learning log exercise, and had placed study firmly at the top of my priorities.
When everything went crazy at work, suddenly my study went out the window. My sole aim during this time was to do everything I could to help the business survive. I worked unpaid up to 18 hours a day, without a day off for a period of about two weeks. Perhaps if the business owner was not a personal friend I would have sacrificed my job (which would certainly have further jeopardised the business) rather than my studies.
Certainly it took a toll on my health, and powers of thought and concentration which developed during the first half of SSK12 seem to have evaporated. I am not quite as exhausted or burnt out as I felt last week, having had the weekend to recuperate. I still feel like a bomb blast victim, in shock, disoriented and trying to make sense of what just happened.
My new sense of perspective places very little importance on the content of SSK12 after what has occurred at work. It is confusing, since I have no personal stake in the business (apart from some small loans to my boss) but in my studies I have a very personal stake. Yet I cannot stop thinking about what else I can do to help the business recover.
It has me worried because this is not the first time I have put work before other important things in my life. It seems to me I have my priorities totally wrong, but I feel incapable of putting them right at the moment.
The next few weeks should get easier, as the situation at work is improving. It looks like my hours will be reduced since there has been a significant loss of business, and my boss can’t afford to pay me to work the same hours. So I will have more time to get back into my studies.
My strategy will be to review my study goals and once more try and get my mind into ‘the zone’. I am fortunate that I am in supportive surroundings – my own office, no kids to look after, no need to work more hours.