• Mouldy peppers

    Some friends of ours grow hot chili peppers in their garden, but don’t use them in the kitchen at all.. and gave H a plastic bag full of them. A bit too many of them for us I think, they are starting to go mouldy. We should have dried them.

    Really liking my Wednesdays off. I work full days Mon, Tue, Thurs and Fri now. Wednesday breaks it up nicely. Today I did a food run up the the RSPCA Toowoomba – they gave food to me for the group I’m involved with. Then later in the day I finished off another assignment, only two MYOB units and then the WPH & S unit to go and I’ll have finally finished my Cert IV.

  • Belt of brandy

    Things getting on top of me again; frustration at work, frustration at home. H is the light of my life, I just can’t stand the disorder we live in. The clutter is driving me crazy. It seems like there is nowhere I can relax and feel at peace, I think I’m losing my mind. I feel that way at work lately too. I’ve tried to change the way I feel and just accept the way things are. Not working. Feel like running away.

    Went to church with Dad today, had a chat about work afterwards, felt ok for a while. Wore off when I got back home, wanted to put a knife to something. Preparing for dinner, saw the old bottle of brandy in the pantry. It’s been there something like five or six years, maybe more. Had sudden urge to scull some down. Burnt my throat, but instantly took some of the edge off. Short while later felt heaps better. By the time H got home from work was noticably affected by the alcohol, he commented. Hip flask is probably not a good idea.

  • Extremely bitter argument

    The EBA meeting the other day did not have the hoped for outcome, although happily it did not degenerate into the shouting match some of us feared. Management laid it on the line apparently, but the QNU didn’t budge and are now encouraging their members to take industrial action.

    There was a report about it in the local paper, complete with the usual misleading reporting that is apparent when you work behind the scenes. It published a comment from a nurse about money wasted on financial analysis. Where on earth did she get this from? Even if money had been spent on it, I think it would have been a pretty sensible investment in the circumstances, but the fact is the financial advice was from two qualified accountants who sit on the board, the honorary treasurer and chairperson. Maybe they forgot to send their bill?

    After the meeting I saw a lot of long faces amongst the nurses, worried about the future. I think the QNU is doing really badly by them. One of the RNs confided to me that it seemed like any moderate, reasonable view is ignored. The union is backing a small handful of very vocal employees that are refusing to compromise on the pay issue regardless of what it might cost the organisation. You want to support the nurses, the work they do deserves to be rewarded but it is difficult to sympathise with this mentality.

    In a wages comparison they don’t appear that badly off. They are paid above award, and well above the nurses at other community hospices (one in Toowoomba, one on the Gold Coast). They are paid marginally less than the local private hospital, but are demanding equal pay to the higher paid public sector. And I’ve been told that working conditions in a public hospital are much harder than those at the hospice.

    Sadly it all begins to look like greed and self-interest, which is so wrong because many of the nurses are the most caring, intelligent and respectable people I’ve met.

  • Boojay

    It’s budget, love. (from the Budget Direct car insurance TV ads).

    Always an interesting time, I’ve had 12 solid months in my role now and the new financial year coming up is an opportunity to streamline some of my work processes, including the design of operational and program budgets in a way that will make reporting easier.

    Some principles to help me on my way:

    It’s been a week of the walking wounded. Karen (admin and backup payroll person) announced that she is pregnant and has been getting all the usual symptoms of morning sickness; Alison (our fundraising/marketing person) has developed high blood pressure and having fainting spells; I put my back out from some weekend volunteer work; my volunteer offsider Jan has been visiting her husband in hospital and waiting for him to be assessed for a nursing home; and youngest nephew Wyatt nearly lost his thumb in a door jamming accident.

    Today is going to be an interesting day at work, possibly very stressful. Management finally meeting with staff to try and resolve the impasse with our EBA. Past negotiations have been highly charged, there is a bit of nervousness about how the meeting will go. I’m not required to attend meeting, but I’m caught up in it of course. Not so much as Ros though. What a terrible strain it is for her.

  • Getting my affairs in order

    It’s been a tough couple of weeks. I don’t know what really triggered this episode but my thoughts have now moved off suicidal fantasies onto the practicalities of winding up my affairs so I can make a change. ANZAC day has just passed and I found myself envying the diggers who lost their lives heroically in the war. Maybe I should visit the counsellor again; I have been so miserable lately. Just want to disappear without a fuss, leave things neatly in order. I wish to God I wasn’t made this way. I just want to blot out my existence, without any consequences, yet I would like to be missed. People would miss me, I suppose it would be those people I love and they will be very hurt. My mum and dad, Joanne (how could I do this to them?) and my very favourite person, Hermie.

    Drinking some rough old brandy, it is bringing tears to my eyes as I gulp it down.

    Cry for help, it’s oh so embarrassing.

  • Possums!

    A bit sore and worse for wear this morning, following my unintended slapstick routine around 1am. Woke up to hear Ebby barking shrilly at the possums in our trees, they were breaking tree branches and grunting, having a very noisy party, so I thought it might be a bit quieter for the neighborhood if I brought Ebby inside the house, as she was setting off other dogs.

    Slipped the lead on Ebby when I let her out of her run and she took off after the possums. I fell over and by trying to hold on to her I got a very painful rope burn on my fingers from the lead. She got free and was racing around like a maniac, and I was wandering around after her in the dark, like an idiot, trying to grab her.

    Meanwhile Spook was making a din with her crying because she wanted to be let out too, and I was swearing at them both as I kept bumping into things. Bumped into the new wire trellis with our passionfruit vines and nearly broke my glasses, then tripped over a big branch on the ground and landed heavily on my knee.

    Eventually I captured the naughty Ebby and locked her in the bathroom while I put some ice on my sore hand, and hobbled back upstairs to bed. I don’t know if my attempts to keep the peace were really worth all of that pain and anguish!