Author: Melissa

Tagged along with H. today, he had promised to drop in on his good friends and colleagues Troy and Mary. Their toddler son John phoned last week to invite H. to see his “mouse”. Turns out the mouse was the second hand on a little wrist watch! He is a delightful kid, bright and a great laugh, he has great parents I think.

At last psych session Carrie gave me a chart containing several boxes labelled with areas of life such as work, hobbies, parenting, family, social relationships. Called the “life compass” its function is to help me decide which values in each of these areas are important to me, to prioritise the importance of each area and to indicate how well I think I am doing in each area.

What a hard one. This exercise requires me to take action and confront things I’d rather not face.

I remember doing one of these things a couple of years ago, the last time I was seeing a psych (just before I stopped going!) and I think I left the “parenting” box blank because I’m not a parent. This time I wrote “more time with family – nieces and nephews”. Carrie said I next had to set myself a small task which would take me a step closer to achieving that. I said I would call my brother and ask how the kids were.

Trouble is I hardly talk to my brother anymore, I always feel a bit nervous around his wife. I guess I’m worried about how she must perceive me, and that I’ll make a mess of things. We don’t have a lot in common, she’s had 7 kids to my brother, I’ve had no kids. I feel a bit inferior next to that, like I don’t have a true grip on real life or something.

I guess this is less about the nieces and nephews and more about developing the relationship with my brother and his family.

I miss my brother, I feel like I’ve lost him, but I realise that if I had involved myself unobtrusively with his family life I could still have had a good relationship with him.

So I guess this really belongs under “Family Relationships” rather than “Parenting”. I want to re-establish that contact but right now it feels like a very hard thing to do.

Paul invited us to dinner at his place on Saturday evening. He’s done a lot of work on his house, and we dined out on the newly refurbished front veranda. Paul’s good friend John manned the barbecue and cooked up some juicy steaks while Paul prepared the salads; and H and I chatted with John’s friend Karen. After the meal we went inside into the cool for dessert, a Tiramisu torte from the Cheesecake Shop. After dessert and coffee, Paul invited us to select a movie from his DVD collection and we made ourselves comfortable on the lounge to watch Gran Turismo, with Clint Eastwood.

Great movie, quintessential Clint with an unexpected non-Hollywood ending.

Everything in the “lettuce barrow” went to seed so yesterday I stripped them out and sowed some pretty wildflowers in their place.

Swan River Daisy. Blue star-like flowers with a sweet, light scent appear above mounds of feathery foliage. Ideal subjects for containers and bedding. Annual. Height 30cm.

Location: Prefers a well-drained sunny situation
Sow: Thinly 5mm deep, direct in flowering position
Seedlings emerge: 10-14 days
Spacing: Thin out as necessary to 20cm apart
Flowers: Approx 16 weeks from sowing
Care: Needs little attention. Do not overwater

I’m on the third day of some annual leave from work and it has been very HOT. There is the massive cyclone Yasi happening up north and flood recovery every where else.

It is nice to be spending extra time with hubby. I love when he does little thoughtful things for me, like offering to carry a heavy package.

In the last couple of days we both put in a claim for the flood disaster relief payment from federal government. We hadn’t been severely effected, and I wasn’t sure about putting in a claim, but we were eligible.

After taking care of the claim hubby took me for a drive to try a pork salad roll at a Vietnamese take away. He discovered these a couple of years ago and has raved about them ever since, and introduced many of his colleagues to them. Finally we had an opportunity for him to take me and they were very nice, a touch more chili than I’m used to (hubby said they don’t normally put so much on).

Today I went and got my hair cut super short – I resemble a porcupine. It feels great in this hot weather, but I am glad my hair grows pretty quickly. Maybe a little too short.

Tomorrow I’m getting the car serviced, gradually getting all the chores done that I wanted to get through this fortnight.

Was trying to remember the name of the artist work colleague Karen told me about. This female musician was from Darwin and played the ukele. I was unprepared for the number of references on Google after I typed in the search terms “ukelele” and “Darwin”. Seems that the instrument is very popular up north, and there is a group of people who call themselves “Dukes” – Darwin ukelele collective. They gather in public places such as parks and pubs and have ukelele jam sessions.

I finally found the musician Karen was telling me about – Leah Flanagan, with a style described as “equal parts Lucinda Williams and Shirley Bassey” (Jeff Apter, author). I’ve been enjoying her “September Song” which features uke strumming – quite a different sound, and kind of refreshing to the ears. I think the ukelele is a musical instrument that is often overlooked. It looks and sounds like a toy guitar but when played well, it evokes a laid back, relaxed mood reminiscent of the sunset, of gentle waves lapping onto a clean sandy beach, a cooling breeze and perhaps a nice tall glass of something.